Incurable Laziness

I didn’t make any specific new years resolutions this year, but I did look at the coming year as a clean slate, a new opportunity, and a fresh start.  And I have to tell you, my burst of “New Year Motivation” lasted nearly to March, which is way longer than usual.  I was getting things done around the house, keeping up with my obligations at work, and feeling good about myself in general.  I spent zero time on social media, and could rarely be found wallowing in depression and self-loathing.

Well, now its April, and here I am blogging when I am supposed to be working.  My motivation has left, and in its place is incurable laziness.  It’s making my work more difficult, making my home life more difficult, and really dragging me down emotionally.  and I just can’t seem to shake it.  I can’t seem to get back on the inspiration bus.

Part of the problem may be that I have no clear aim in life.  No ultimate goal or direction.  Or maybe its the constant nagging feeling of meaninglessness, or fear of failure.  But I’m not completely without hope, because this is just one part of a cycle I have been repeating for years, and soon enough I will be back on top, getting things done, and making stuff happen.  Another reason I am hopeful, is that I have been consistently working to  stretch out the periods of inspiration and productivity, and slowly abbreviate the lazy lump periods.


4 thoughts on “Incurable Laziness

  1. Sometimes we believe that motivation is linear and should continue endlessly. Yet nature is not linear, and neither are we humans, who are an expression of nature; grass does not grow the same length each day, and neither are we humans the same each day. If we believe that motivation for a behavior must go on endlessly, we must be careful that we are holding on to something rather than staying attuned to the ever changing world around us and responding flexibly. Yet, paradoxically, there are times when motivation needs to be continuous: dipers need to be changed and the house needs to be cleaned.

    Yet from one perspective, it is how we perceive these tasks which affects our motivation for them. Our minds and moods are like clouds in the sky. Clouds come and go, as do feelings. The sky remains. Be the sky, and let it be your motivation. From a different perspective, in the Book of Chuang Tzu it says: Innate nature is what motivates life. Motivation which is untrue is lost.

    Perhaps we have many purposes in life, and for some parents it may be to help raise a generation of children who can demonstrate far more love for others than the monkeys who are currently running politics, the media, and other profit-hungry and questionably ethical corporate entities. Yes, we all have bills to pay, and yet raising happy children while being able to give them the basics in life is noble in my meager eyes.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I really appreciate your thoughtful comments. sometimes i think you put more effort into your comments than I put into my blog posts. I like the analogy of the sky, I think it will be helpful for me to remember that. Thanks again!

      Liked by 1 person

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